


Incendium

by eorumverba



Category: SHINee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-26
Updated: 2016-12-26
Packaged: 2018-09-12 10:00:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9066964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eorumverba/pseuds/eorumverba
Summary: And when Jonghyun looks up at Kibum again, he freezes for just a second, because in that moment, he looks ethereal and beautiful with smoke hazing around his face and moonlight reflected in his eyes.





	

The first time Jonghyun really speaks to Kibum, he’s in the music room. He’s inking out notes for his new song (still untitled) when suddenly the door opens and Kim Kibum walks in. He’s alone, and Jonghyun freezes when their gazes meet. Kibum’s eyes sweep up and down almost imperceptibly before he speaks.

“What are you doing this weekend?”

“Nothing…or, I might have-”

“Cancel it.” Kibum interrupts, then spins around to leave.

“Wait! Kibum?” and when Kibum stops, “how did you find me?”

Kibum turns back to face him, one brow raised. It makes him appear haughty, or maybe amused. “I have eyes everywhere, Jonghyun.” When Jonghyun says nothing, Kibum turns back to leave.

Jonghyun’s breath whooshes out as soon as the door shuts quietly behind him.

Everyone in the school knows Kim Kibum; he is the sole ruler of the school, almost always with his main underlings (a freshman, Taemin, and two juniors named Woohyun and Nicole). Kibum is also friendly with Jonghyun’s closest friends, Jinki and Minho. But that’s no surprise: everyone knows and loves their class president, and the athletic pride of the school. Jonghyun is just in the middle of the popularity chain: he knows everyone and everyone knows him, but they’re not _friendly_. He wouldn’t say he has many friends (just Jinki and Minho), but he’s fine with that. He has his music.

But Kim Kibum? Jonghyun has…spoken to him in passing, has had classes with him before, and he had probably been the only one that was able to properly _speak_ to Kibum without stuttering. Jonghyun is in the same grade as Kibum and they are familiar with each other even if they’ve never had a real conversation, something that wasn’t about school.

And Jonghyun is fine with that, because Kim Kibum is everything he is not: beautiful and unapproachable, alluring and ethereal. As for himself, he is…unassuming, subservient and humble. Unlike Kibum, Jonghyun does not mind keeping to himself, does not mind being relatively unknown and disregarded.

In all sense of the word, Jonghyun is completely ordinary.

The next day, when he gets to the music room, Kibum is there, scrolling through his phone. “Kibum?”

Kibum jumps and then smiles tightly at Jonghyun. “Jonghyun. Did you clear your schedule?”

“Yes? But why-”

“We’re going on a road trip, just the two of us. I’ll drive you to your house so you can get your stuff right after school Friday and we’ll be back Sunday afternoon.”

“What? Why-”

“Pack your bags, Jonghyun. We’re going to a music festival. And I’m paying for everything, don’t worry. I’ll talk to your parents as well,” Kibum looks back up at Jonghyun, smile not reaching his eyes, “capiche?”

“I…I guess. I’ll see you Friday?”

Kibum just nods and stands to go, and over his shoulder, he says, “The part where you’re stuck. You should try a minor key. It would sound interesting with your voice.”

Jonghyun is skeptical, but he finds that it _works_. A smile spreads across his lips as he continues figuring out notes and singing along, just enough to figure out his vocal range. The whole while though, he keeps thinking about Kibum.

> _It’s late, let’s go home now_  
>  It’s another late night and I’m taking you home  
> The moon is big, it’s a full moon  
> If I let you go like this, I won’t be able to sleep for a while

Friday comes soon enough and Jonghyun waits outside for Kibum, sees him pull up and hops in the back. Taemin is in the passenger’s seat and he grins back at Jonghyun, curiosity in his eyes, “Hi. You’re really cute.”

“I’m-”

“Stop flirting with him, Taeminnie. It’s not cute.”

Taemin rolls his eyes conspiratorially at Jonghyun before pouting. “I’m cute, aren’t I cute?”

“He’s pretty cute.” Jonghyun nods, grinning when Taemin sticks his tongue out at Kibum.

“See, everyone thinks I’m super cute!”

“Not me. Shut up, gremlin.”

Taemin cackles and fiddles with the radio as soon as Kibum starts to drive. He ends up leaving it on a station that’s playing some cutesy girl group song that he starts doing choreo to. Jonghyun can’t help giggling and Taemin grins back at him through the mirror.

“Kibummie, I _like_ him. I like him a lot.”

“Shut up, Taemin.”

“Kibummie!” Jonghyun says then, and Taemin gasps.

“He’s so _cute_ ,” and to Jonghyun, “you’re so _cute!_ ”

Jonghyun beams at the praise and nods, making his eyes wide and his smile cute. “I’m really cute, huh?”

“Super cute. I wanna kiss your cheeks, you’re so cute.”

Jonghyun grins, leans in and Taemin does too, cackles when Jonghyun whispers, “Which set?”

“I _like_ him!”

“I heard that, and I am not amused.” But there is an amused little grin curving Kibum’s pretty lips up and then he stops the car and Taemin hops out.

“Nice to meet you, Jonghyun. Hey, you should hang out with us some time.”

“Noted,” Jonghyun says, gets out the car to take Taemin’s seat and is surprised when Taemin hugs him tight.

“Hey, be careful with this one, Kibum. Have a good weekend, you two.”

“What did he mean?”

Kibum shrugs, even though there’s a little grin playing across his lips. “Nothing. Which way is your house?”

“Oh, you can keep going.” Jonghyun directs Kibum to his house, jumps out the car and quickly switches out his backpack for his dufflebag and jogs back to the car.

“Where to?”

“My place, and then we’re off. Ever been to a music festival?”

“No, have you?”

“Nope.”

Jonghyun wants to ask _then why now?_ but as soon as he opens his mouth, Kibum speaks. “I think I wanted to do this with you because I see how passionate you are about your music. You’re always…writing and humming and singing and playing piano. It’s…admirable. And your lyrics, they’re very good. Your music is very expressive.”

Which brings up another point. “Does that mean you play an instrument too, Kibum? You seem knowledgable about music.”

Kibum shrugs a shoulder and gives Jonghyun a little grin before turning back to the wheel. “I was a dancer, you know. I wanted to be an idol when I was younger, and I wanted to conquer the world. But that didn’t happen.”

Jonghyun wants to ask what exactly _did_ happen, but the look on Kibum’s face says no more talking, and Jonghyun does not mind that at all. (Besides, he can only assume that Kibum had gotten injured, or failed his auditions. Maybe he’d been told he didn’t have the talent or the looks, but that was impossible. Kibum is flawless, perfect, unworldly.)

Shaking his head from thoughts of Kibum, Jonghyun pulls out his phone, headphones and a little notebook and begins to pen out the lyrics that had been in his head all day.

> _Oh beautiful tonight, oh say, oh say, oh say, oh say  
>  Oh beautiful tonight, oh say, oh say, oh say, oh say_

He doesn’t know when he’d fallen asleep, but Jonghyun jerks awake suddenly; the car has stopped and it’s evening, they’re at a gas station and Kibum smiles at him. “You slept well?”

“Yeah…” Jonghyun gets out to stretch, “do you want me to drive?”

“ _No_ ,” Kibum sounds scandalized, “no one drives my baby other than me.”

They pile back into the car after buying snacks and set off down the road again. Jonghyun is idly humming along to the song playing on the radio. His fingers dance over his thigh like he’s playing piano and Kibum’s gaze flicks down to his fingers more than once.

“How long have you been playing piano?”

“Years…since I was eight or nine. I picked up guitar when I was twelve, I think.”

Kibum nods and Jonghyun studies his profile: the sharpness of his jaw and cheekbones, the pink of his lips, his nose, the feline shape of his eyes, his dark hair falling into his face. He is very attractive and Jonghyun can’t help _staring_.

“Is there something on my face?”

“You’re very attractive, that’s all.”

And Kibum - stoic, intimidating Kibum - _blushes_.

(Jonghyun finds that he _likes_ being the one to make Kibum blush.)

“Anyway,” Kibum says then, speaking quickly, “are you comfortable with sleeping in the car? I’d rather save money than use it on a motel.”

“The car is fine,” Jonghyun says slowly, “but please don’t be offended if I don’t sleep, as much as you do, or at all. I have insomnia.”

“Oh,” Kibum doesn’t sound surprised at all, “I know.”

“You do?”

“Dark circles,” Kibum clarifies, “they’re very obvious. You should try using concealer, maybe.”

“Oh.” Jonghyun doesn’t know what else to say, so he falls silent, and they stay silent until they pull over. Almost as soon as they stop, Kibum digs out a sweatshirt from his bag and closes his eyes.

“Goodnight,” he murmurs, and Jonghyun echoes it, quieter. The moon is full and bright and the shadows and planes and curves of Kibum’s side profile, his steady breaths and even the way he can imagine Kibum’s open eyes, his sharp tone and his bright smile gives Jonghyun plenty of inspiration for lyrics.

> _It’s late, let’s go home now_  
>  It’s another late night and I’m taking you home  
> The moon is big, it’s a full moon  
> If I let you go like this, I won’t be able to sleep for a while

Kibum is gorgeous like this, him and the moon and the stars he can faintly see; the night is beautiful and Jonghyun hopes that this night will be one of the ones he’ll never forget.

And surprisingly, he sleeps well that night.

The next day is the festival: Kibum has on a black mesh tank top and light jeans that have most of the front ripped away. On anyone else it’d look stupid, but Jonghyun quite _likes_ the look on Kibum, especially with his dark hair slicked back away from his face.

“You look nice,” Jonghyun says, eyes lingering on the leather jacket tossed in the back of the car, “are you wearing that too?”

“Of course,” Kibum rolls his eyes, “I couldn’t _not_.”

“Won’t it be too hot-”

“Fashion is pain,” Kibum insists, “and I already know I’ll look _great_.”

“Don’t you always,” Jonghyun hums, mostly to himself. He’s almost beginning to doubt his clothing choice (all black, a Guns n Roses tank top and tight, tight pants) but Kibum glances at him sidelong just long enough for him to look Jonghyun up and down, and then he says,

“You look good too.”

> _Oh beautiful tonight, oh say, oh say, oh say, oh say  
>  Oh beautiful tonight, oh say, oh say, oh say, oh say_

Jonghyun is… _very_ flattered from the praise but he doesn’t show it, instead nods like Kibum’s approval means little to him. “How long until we get there?”

“Maybe an hour?” Kibum shrugs, “do you want to stop and get food before we get there? It’ll probably be a lot cheaper to get something on the road.”

“If we pass something,” Jonghyun allows.

“Good, I’d kill for some coffee.”

Jonghyun wants to ask if he can drive, but Kibum _looks_ at him and he changes his mind.

By the time they reach the festival site, the sun is high in the sky and there are already people roaming around. Kibum grabs for Jonghyun’s hand as soon as they get onsite and insists it’s because he doesn’t want to lose him. All Kibum has on him is his phone and a portable charger in his jacket pocket and Jonghyun only has his phone and wallet in his pockets. They roam from band to band, staying for all the ones they both deem worthy, and shy away from all sight and smell of food. And being the romanticist Jonghyun is, he almost thinks that he and Kibum are meant for each other with the way their taste in music collides. Kibum likes even the more obscure bands that Jonghyun likes, and while Jonghyun _does_ dislike one of Kibum’s favorites, he agrees to try to listen to them again on the way home.

Kibum makes Jonghyun take millions of pictures of him; ridiculous poses and others that are Instagram worthy - there are some of both of them and millions of selcas Kibum takes himself after seemingly pointless hair and facial adjustments. Like the one time where he’d spent no less than ten minutes brushing his bangs into his eyes before _running his hand through his hair to slick it back for the picture_. Jonghyun had no idea why Kibum bothered to spend all that time fixing hair if the end effect was to mess it up again, but when he saw the finished product, he kind of understood why.

The day passes quickly in a haze of loud music and _so much sweat_ and Kibum and by the end of it all, Jonghyun wants to both go home and stay longer. But when night falls, Kibum takes his hand again (they have held hands for most of the day and Jonghyun can’t say he minds) and leads him back to the car.

They’re in the backseat of the car - it’s Kibum that pulls out the bowl and the weed, whispers a question that Jonghyun hesitantly nods to. He watches Kibum measure it out, watches him pack the weed to the rim of the bowl, watches him light it with trembling fingers. When Jonghyun reaches out to take the bowl, he realizes that his hands are trembling and suddenly he’s hyperaware of how close and _alone_ they are and the subtle scent (he can only describe it as being citrusy and lemony) that is hovering around Kibum.

Their fingers brush and Jonghyun’s gaze flies up to meet Kibum’s; the other smiles gently at Jonghyun and suddenly, he doesn’t feel nervous anymore. Because while Jonghyun is no stranger to smoking (he’s only done it a few times, and he doesn’t particularly love or hate it), he doesn’t want to mess up, not in front of Kibum. But the look in Kibum’s eye is so… _fond_ that Jonghyun ducks his head to avoid his gaze, and before he can lose his nerve, he takes the first hit. And when Jonghyun looks up at Kibum again, he freezes for just a second, because in that moment, he looks ethereal and beautiful with smoke hazing around his face and moonlight reflected in his eyes.

And Jonghyun doesn’t know if it’s the drugs or the heat or the emotions tumbling in his stomach, but Jonghyun takes the bowl from Kibum’s hand (he thinks he’d be nervous, but the weed - he supposes it’s the weed, anyway - has replaced his anxiety with vague want). When Kibum looks up, Jonghyun touches a finger to his lips and Kibum must _realize_ what Jonghyun wants because he parts his lips and sucks in Jonghyun’s finger. They’re both still until Jonghyun feels Kibum’s tongue light on his finger and then they’re both leaning in for a kiss that is soft and sickly sweet. Jonghyun places the bowl on the far right seat before sliding to the middle seat to kiss Kibum better, hold him tighter. His fingers are trembling but he wants this and the way Kibum kisses him back tells Jonghyun that he wants him too.

At some point they fall asleep (they haven’t done anything more than kiss, but even that had set Jonghyun’s veins on fire) and when Jonghyun wakes up in the early hours of the morning, he’s pressed against the door and Kibum is in his arms, still asleep. He wishes, at that moment, that he had his notebook, because there are more lyrics in his head.

> _I go this way every day but I pretend I didn’t hear you_  
>  As I go round and round, you probably noticed right?  
> I don’t mean anything else,  
> I just wanna be with you a little more, that’s why I’m doing this

Kibum doesn’t wake up until hours later; the sun is just beginning to rise. Kibum presses a sleepy kiss to Jonghyun’s lips and then they go out to watch the sunrise on the hood of the car. They’re holding hands and it feels like they’re on top of the world and all Jonghyun can think is that he doesn’t want this day to end.

Kibum lets Jonghyun drive home after he finishes scribbling down his thoughts on a clean sheet of paper.

It’s just past sunset by the time they get back to their familiar neighborhood - they could’ve gotten there sooner but there were so many times Jonghyun parked the car (usually on Kibum’s command) so they could get out and stretch and kiss. At one point it ends with them in the backseat, the door is open so their legs can dangle out and Kibum’s weight is a comforting, sweat-sticky blanket and it feels so _natural_ for Jonghyun to place his hands against the sweat-damp skin of Kibum’s back, beneath his shirt. Kibum rears back then, spine an elegant arch so he can stare down at Jonghyun, and then his swollen lips part so he can murmur, “What will we do on Monday?”

Instead of answering, Jonghyun tugs him back down for another breath-stopping kiss.

(He doesn’t know, and he doesn’t want to find out.)

“Run away with me,” Kibum whispers when they get to Jonghyun’s house, “run away with me.”

Jonghyun hesitates for barely a moment before nodding his head, and he drives off with one hand holding Kibum’s, the other on the wheel.

Except that’s not how it goes.

“I had fun,” Kibum whispers when they get to Jonghyun’s house, “goodbye.”

Jonghyun hesitates for barely a moment before nodding his head, and he steps out of the car without another glance behind him.

> _Let’s get up now, why is it so sad?_  
>  We’ve been saying the same things for the past 30 minutes  
> I can’t hold your hand, let go of your hand or hug you  
> So I’m only looking at your pretty eyes, nose and red cheeks and lips

School the next day is…different. Jonghyun is both nervous and excited to see Kibum. He spends lunch in the music room again, but he doesn’t touch the piano - he sits on the bench with his back to the keys - and writes out his thoughts and his feelings, everything that had gone on that weekend.

He doesn’t want to _forget_. He wants to keep in each moment of that weekend, from the long drive to Kibum’s soft voice and the way the car had smelled, the heat of the sun on his shoulders and back, the sweat-slick softness of his hand, his skin beneath his shirt. Their first kiss, the drug-induced sweetness and all the kisses to follow, the softness and shape of Kibum’s lips, all the little noises he’d pulled from them. He wants…to be closer to Kibum now, doesn’t know what sort of label he wants them to have. _Friends_ like how Kibum is with Taemin or Nicole isn’t what he wants, but neither is that _are-they-friends-or-are-they-more_ thing Kibum has with Woohyun, but _boyfriends_ …

_How, just how can I get you?  
Don’t go, don’t go, will those words work?_

When Jonghyun looks up, Kibum is standing in the doorway. There’s an unreadable expression on his face and Jonghyun doesn’t try to decipher it, just stares back, eyes roving over Kibum’s face. His lips are the same pretty pink and his skin is slightly more tan - Jonghyun knows that there is a slight sunburn on his shoulders from when Kibum had finally taken off his jacket and wrapped it around his waist - and Jonghyun can practically _feel_ the soft of his skin. His hand twitches almost imperceptibly but Kibum latches onto the movement and licks his lips subconsciously. The smoky eyeliner is back but Jonghyun misses how fresh-faced Kibum had been for the festival, how much more natural and free he’d looked.

> _Oh beautiful tonight, oh say, oh say, oh say, oh say  
>  Oh beautiful tonight, oh say, oh say, oh say, oh say_

Kibum doesn’t say anything and neither does Jonghyun; he barely notices when Kibum slips out of the room and the next time they see each other is at the end of the day. Jonghyun is getting ready to walk home and Taemin is just getting into Kibum’s car, and their eyes meet. Jonghyun stops walking and Kibum’s hand freezes in midair and Jonghyun can’t help feeling…strangely (betrayed nostalgic _aching in his chest_ ) when he sees Taemin sitting in _his_ seat.

Kibum freezes, and when Taemin turns around to see what was going on, he meets Jonghyun’s gaze and his face splits into a grin. He beckons for Jonghyun to come over and gets into the backseat, grinning widely and as soon as Jonghyun slips into the passenger’s seat, everything feels _right_ again.

As soon as they drop Taemin off, they head to the edge of town and watch the sun set on the warm hood of the car, holding hands tightly. Jonghyun kisses Kibum and Kibum kisses back and it’s beautiful like this - just him and Kibum and the stars and the setting sun and the rising moon.

“You’re beautiful,” Jonghyun whispers when they part for air, and before he can psych himself out, “be mine.”

Kibum just flushes pink and leans in to kiss Jonghyun again. His lips are curved into a grin and Jonghyun almost, _almost_ misses his breathy _yes_.

> _Oh beautiful tonight, yeah_


End file.
